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My Swagger: How I got it


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Here I go with another relationship thread. I'm still getting the gist of these things but I learn quickly. Anyway, here goes:

Most guys have a girl that woke them up to how real world relationships operate. A female that woke you up from that dreamy romantic ideal your mother ingrained in your mind. Yes, she might have played you for a fool, but from that point on you knew how to play the game. You realized every girl is not a princess and you gotta be selective.

That's how I am with every female I encounter. I try to be a gentleman, which I am at heart, and I get all that crap thrown in my face. I try to be myself, girls think I'm too nice, I come off arrogant, girls think I'm a jerk. I come off being a gentleman they think I'd make a great boyfriend for some other chick. I've come to my conclusion that some females don't know what the hell they want, period. The sad thing is all the guys that they always talk about that they want to have as a boyfriend, turn out to be their closest male friend. My question is, how are you ever going to find "the one" when the minute you find a guy that's worth something you throw him in your friend zone? Not only that, but after you tell all your goods to these guys about all your dirt, do you expect them not to react to it?

I got plenty of female friends who I am perfectly fine with being just friends with becuz I don't want anything on any other level with them. They do know however not to come to me with too much off the wall stuff about them and some other guy becuz I let them know that it ain't just me, no guy wants to hear about what you doin with some other guy. It is interesting however how they react once they get into a relationship. There were a few of my friends who at one point I may have been feeling but they wanted to keep things on just a friendship level who reacted crazy when they found out I had a girl and started getting jealous. I'm thinking "How you gonna get jealous and you not my girl". I gave them a chance to be my girl by approaching them in that way and they only wanted to be friends, but now I got a girl and they wanna act like they been tryin to get with me the whole time. That crap annoys me. It's like some women don't want something until somebody else has it and that's a real immature trait to have. That's something kids do with toys.

I'm not gonna be sitting on the phone at 4AM listening to your problems, Sending roses at your house and leaving love messages of Brian McKnight over your answer machine...I've been through it all. I've done every simping thing you can think of THINKING that it was gonna get me play because it was the nice thing to do and I thought women apperciated nice things. As I got older, I realized that it wasn't getting me anywhere except broken hearts and when you think about it, all of that nice guy junk dont get you anywhere except lonely saturday nights. While you dreaming about that dream girl, a thug cat is actually tearing it up while you're at home on saturday night thinking about her watching Dave Chapelle. Yet if she gets her *** kicked she's crying to you over the phone and you listening to her problems over again and once you think you really have her?

She goes off and screws him again while you get left in the dust... Its a cycle that would go on throughout the whole relatonship, AKA friendship.

Most women will later realize that nice guys are smart.

Smart nice guys have good jobs.

Smart nice guys with good jobs make good money.

Smart nice guys with good money provide a life of security and comfort.

Smart nice guys also make good fathers.

I'm a real laid back dude so ladies in my presence always say that they feel like they know me already. They automatically want to open up to me. I'm just a good listener and talker, so ladies would ask me for advice all the time cause I gave them the male perspective they knew little about....and they would be like "Ariel, you're so sweet.....You're so nice....Why you aint got no girl?" And I'm sitting there like "I ain't got no girl cause everyone I want treat me like you do."

I know some females are wondering if I'm going to let a couple experiences jade my views on a gender, but think of it this way...it's like coming home from a trip and finding out thieves were in your house.

You can't continue being as careless as you were before, now can you?

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Some quick tips from AstroEric, aka AphroEric (but not AfroEric) on the subject of good lovin':

Dating, especially at your age, is a weeding out process. What are the chances that the true love of your life is going to come from somewhere on your block? Date to have fun now. Get the experience, not in wooing, but in dealing with your opposite on a human-to-human basis. Practice the intricate arts of meeting parents, remembering anniversaries, giving massages after long days at work, listening to them complain after talking to their mother on the phone, knowing the difference between an I love you kiss and an I want you kiss, etc. etc.

In many cases, it's not that they don't realize that about the smart guys until later, it's that they know it now and are putting off that long committment. When you wind up dating a smart, nice person, your party days are over. And that would be a waste of a full liquor cabinet.

If chances are that you could be serious about a girl, do not, I repeat, do not sleep with her best friend. Even if you don't think the girl you really like will give you any chance whatsoever. Even if you are drunk. If you find yourself in this situation, do not go to find the girl to ask her if you can borrow a condom so that you can practice safe sex with her friend.

...Unless you think you can work that jealous angle. It works for some.

And when you do meet the girl of your dreams, don't expect her to be a virgin these days. Especially if you're not. And don't be more than a little jealous of her previous beaus, the guy at her workplace, or Patrick Dempsey on Grey's Anatomy, unless she gives you explicit reason to be.

Expect things to change a little when you move in. Put your dirty socks in the hamper and learn to dry your back when you get out of the shower. These two simple things will save you hours of trouble.

Has there ever been a female member of this forum?


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eh just have fun till the fear of dying alone kicks in then marry the best thing available. :D





And stay the [naughty word] away from each other as much as possible.

Those are my keys to a long and successful marriage (relationship too I suppose if you are serious)

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funniest quote of the month

"I'm not gonna be sitting on the phone at 4AM listening to your problems, Sending roses at your house and leaving love messages of Brian McKnight over your answer machine..."

Ok dude, try not to get with women that talk like this:

"Why you aint got no girl?"

Dude you're like, what, 18? THE ONE may not be around the corner for a few years. I didn't even get to meet my wife until I was 19. You'll be cool.

If not, I just wanna know one thing? "Why you aint got no girl?"

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Astro Eric is definantly right. Dating is a learning process at this age. You learn a little more about women every time you date one or interact with them. Don't go around looking for "the one" right now. Women don't like that at all at that age and you might end up scaring them. Look to have a good time and have some fun with them.

Another thing from my experience, once you meet a girl ask her out and make it obvious that you are intersted in her soon because if you wait to make a move you fall off into that dreadful friend category.

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